Wholly Dependent

Jesus answered him, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born again he cannot see the kingdom of God.” John 3:3

But the tax collector, standing far off, would not even lift up his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast, saying, ‘God, be merciful to me, a sinner!’ – Luke 18:13

In the Spring of 2003 a reckless driver who had run a stop sign yet was able to swerve out of the way at the last second, spared my wife who was still in her 20’s, from becoming a widow and losing her first and only child.

As the driver of the car that had come onto the path of this out-of-control vehicle, I remember looking straight into the oncoming headlights and thinking this truck plus my small car wasn’t going to end well. As the tires from both vehicles started that well-orchestrated screech, I remember thinking…and quite possibly praying that my 10-month old daughter would survive.

If you inventoried the people who knew me well to this point in my life, and asked them what kind of a person I was, they would probably have given you the “he’s a pretty good guy” report. I doubt any one of them would have described me as an adulterer, a thief, a coveter, an idolater, a murderer or an evil son who didn’t honor his parents.  However, according to scripture, I was all that and so much more.

“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” – Matthew 5:27-29

Miraculously, the driver of the truck was able to regain control, swerve around at the last second and resume their reckless driving.  As he sped off without even stopping to apologize, my instincts kicked in and I geared up to chase him down.

I wish I could testify that I was going to calmly pursue this person and offer some friendly advice on the potential hazards of driving recklessly. But, the depravity that we are all born with had come to a boil inside of me and I was fired up like no other time in my life.

Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity, and in sin did my mother conceive me. – Psalm 51:5

I remember checking my rearview mirror and putting my car into gear.  As I looked, I saw the anger in my eyes and then a glimpse of my daughter’s face.  In an instant, I realized that my rules, my reaction and my life were just as reckless as the person who nearly collided into my car.

I spent the next few minutes weeping and trying to come to grips with the fact that I wasn’t in control.  For a person who had always been meticulous in planning and goal setting and lived by the motto, “if it’s going to be, it’s up to me”, I became very aware that day of just how lost I was and for the first time, recognized that there is a god.

On that day, I started dating Christ.  I started trying to be a better person.  I started going to church on days other than Easter and Christmas. I started doing all kinds of things that made me feel better about me. I never once opened up God’s Word to see what he wanted me to start doing. I basically made the Creator of heaven and earth, the God who poured out the oceans from the palm of his hands, my co-pilot.  It would be four years before the Lord would bring me to my knees, and I would pound my chest and beg for the Lord to be merciful to me…a sinner.

There are many examples in the Bible of people coming face-to-face with Christ, being drawn to his teachings, but never transferring their trust and being held captive by the grace that frees us from our sin by the righteousness imputed by Christ. Going to church or spending time with believers does not justify us in the eyes of the Lord. Until we can stand before our Creator, and like the tax collector recognize that we must be contrite and not depend on our own self-righteousness, we can never enter the kingdom of heaven.

Jesus answered, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born of water and the Spirit, he cannot enter the kingdom of God. That which is born of the flesh is flesh, and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit.  Do not marvel that I said to you, ‘You must be born again.’ John 3:5-7

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he l will make straight your paths. Proverbs 3:5-6

As I mentioned before, my life up until and even after becoming a Christian wasn’t and isn’t perfect.  As my pastor reminds us, we aren’t called to be “sinless”, but through the renewal and rewashing by the Holy Spirit, we are called to sin less.  Thankfully, the maturity albeit not perfect, has been steady and consistent.  Praise God.

There are many people with whom I pray there will be an opportunity to share and “re-share” the gospel message with.  Over the past six months, I’ve spent quite a bit of time dwelling on Colossians 3:12-17, and Luke 10:27…it has crushed me in many ways.  It has grown my heart for the lost… for the “friends” of my youth and from my recent past that I know their path, based on their own declaration and lifestyle being in direct opposition to scripture, is headed towards destruction.

“Enter by the narrow gate. For the gate is wide and the way is easy that leads to destruction, and those who enter by it are many.” Matthew 7:13

Some friends I continue to share with, while others, I have prayed earnestly to be at peace with the closed window or slammed door.  While 2 Thessalonians 3:6, commands us to stay away from brothers who are idle, I keep going back to Colossians 3:12-15…and the compassion I have for “friends” crying out “Lord, Lord” and getting a response that’s reserved for, according to James 1:22 “those who have been deceived”, keeps me in prayer to understand who I should pursue and who I should let go.

Fortunately, we need not rely on our own feelings, but as believers who have put their full trust in God, we have his propositional objective word with which to guide our actions.

Excerpted from: Evangelistic Opposition – http://www.focalpointministries.org/sermon/evangelism-101-part-5-10-05/

Mark 6:11-12 – When they refuse to listen

And if any place will not receive you and they will not listen to you, when you leave, shake off the dust that is on your feet as a testimony against them.”  So they went out and proclaimed that people should repent.

2 Timothy 2:23-25  – When reasoning turns into arguing

Have nothing to do with foolish, ignorant controversies; you know that they breed quarrels. And the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but kind to everyone, able to teach, patiently enduring evil, correcting his opponents with gentleness. God may perhaps grant them repentance leading to a knowledge of the truth,

1 Peter 3:15 – When answering turns into attacking

But in your hearts honor Christ the Lord as holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you; yet do it with gentleness and respect,

Matthew 7:6 – When they start to mock Christ

“Do not give dogs what is holy, and do not throw your pearls before pigs, lest they trample them underfoot and turn to attack you.

The perfect Lamb of God was slain to redeem us, resulting in a dependence on the Spirit, and obedience to the will of our Father. We represent him in this world and need to pray that the Spirit will help us discern when to stay and when to go.  Satan is working as the ruler of this world to keep those ripe fields ready for harvest to be laid barren by thwarting our efforts through deceptive distractions…including non-receptive friends and family.

In the late 80’s President Bush sparked, the Points of Light movement, an organization that inspires, equips and mobilizes people to take action that changes the world.

As Christians, we are commanded to be a light in this dark world.  We need not look any further than the codified Word of God, to be convicted, equipped and placed in front of friends, family members, co-workers or that “annoying” person ahead of you at the grocery store, to share not just the reason for our hope, but the need to be reconciled to their creator.

All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be competent, equipped for every good work. 2 Timothy 3:16-17

And while we may be deceptively distracted away from reaching the receptive, we should be prayerfully considering the abundant fields that God has laid before our feet.

In him we have obtained an inheritance, having been predestined according to the purpose of him who works all things according to the counsel of his will, Ephesians 1:11

As we look back upon the paths our sovereign Lord has blessed us with, the many crossroads, the friends, the new directions, let us always remember that we are his children.  Not by our works, but by faith alone through grace, we were purchased to put our dreams, our life, our plans, our relationships…everything on the altar and take up our cross and follow him.

Then Jesus told his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it. Matthew 16:24-25

“Friends forever” isn’t about gaining in popularity; it’s about demonstrating the love that Christ had for us.  Whatever causes us to reconnect to our past, to an old friendship, whether a thought or an upcoming reunion or maybe spending a week with people at their own personal “life-changing” crossroads, I pray that the person they encounter is less a reflection of who you used to be, and more a reflection of the righteousness imputed by Christ.

By this we know love, that he laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for the brothers. 1 John 3:16

Real Friendship

As Christians, we are commanded to, “love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind, and your neighbor as yourself” Luke 10:27.

“Love your neighbor as yourself”… I remember reading this early in my walk, and calling friends to share the news of free forgiveness from God.  As an immature Christian my attempts to lead people away from the ruler of this world, and to focus them on the life, death and resurrection of Christ was primarily done by reconciling them to the truth of God’s Word, not looking at how I was representing Christ.

Over time, as I continued to, “work out my own salvation, with fear and trembling” Philippians 2:12, I saw more and more how my life needed to reflect the goodness of Christ.  If I was going to be a good witness of a person absolutely captivated by God’s grace, I needed to put my house in order, and in response to being his beloved child; the Spirit convicted me to be an “imitator” of God, Ephesians 5:1.

Imagine…your “friend”, one with whom you’ve shared many experiences, hold a great deal of memories with, and who you counted on to get you through the tough times…imagine that they chose to “not get, not want to be a part of, or not feel they have a need to” truly understand what it means to put their full trust in Christ.

And he called out, ‘Father Abraham, have mercy on me, and send Lazarus to dip the end of his finger in water and cool my tongue, for I am in anguish in this flame.’ Luke 16:24

As God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, we are commanded to “put on compassionate hearts” or as Strong’s Concordance puts it “tender mercy from the bowels”, which the Hebrews regarded as the “seat of the more violent passions”, such as love. In my own experience, it’s a gut wrenching feeling driven by the Spirit that gnaws at you until you choose obedience over popularity.

We can rest in the knowledge that, “for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose”Romans 8:28

Nevertheless, as believers we need to remember that we are commanded to “love the Lord your God, with ALL your heart, soul and mind” and to “love your neighbor as yourself.”  This command and connection to love people in need as an act of obedience and living testimony to the transforming power of God’s grace and mercy should be eminently apparent in our everyday walk as Christians.

‘For I was hungry and you gave me no food, I was thirsty and you gave me no drink, I was a stranger and you did not welcome me, naked and you did not clothe me, sick and in prison and you did not visit me.’ Then they also will answer, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and did not minister to you?’ Then he will answer them, saying, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to me.’ Matthew 25:42-45

Pray then that we are obedient to “serve the least of these” at the moment that God opens doors for sharing.  Pray also, that the friend or family member who is reaching out to you or to whom you are reaching out, would be softened in their heart to hear the good news of reconciliation.  Pray that we not love with words or tongue, but with actions and in truth.

By this we shall know that we are of the truth and reassure our heart before him; for whenever our heart condemns us, God is greater than our heart, and he knows everything. 1 John 3:19-20

We have been abundantly blessed.  Withholding the Gospel regardless of where we are in our earthly relationships is not just cruel, but goes against Gods two greatest commandments.

And do not fear those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather fear him who can destroy both soul and body in hell.  Matthew 10:28

Prior to God putting me into his service, I got involved in all kinds of pleasure-seeking activities.  Not all bad from a worldly standard, but definitely living in rebellion in accordance to God’s standards.  Unfortunately, “cross-road” events like graduation, promotions, marriage, parenthood, or salvation are not the only things that puts us on an alternate path from our friends.  Sometimes a pattern of behavior that isn’t part of our new lifestyle or familiar to our new group of friends puts us at odds with our past relationships. And even though our flesh may want to maintain those old friendships, the Word is clear on the path we must take.

The promises we make after high school, to be “friends forever”, rarely lasts a few seasons.  We try and keep in touch, we attempt to reach out, but unless there is some benefit in it for ourselves, we simply lose touch.  So to as new believers, we have a finite period of time before our behavior is either a pleasing aroma to our friends, or we start to stink of death.  And while we are convicted and commanded to reach out, sometimes the door gets closed or even slammed.

For we are the aroma of Christ to God among those who are being saved and among those who are perishing, to one a fragrance from death to death, to the other a fragrance from life to life. 2 Corinthians 2:15-16

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. 2 Corinthians 5:17

Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. Colossians 3:12-13

Each year, between 3.4 and 4.3 million students graduate high school, some go on to college while others choose roads less traveled, like the military, entrepreneurial endeavors, the family business, or some spend time, “finding themselves”.  After spending a week vacationing with my good friend who is also the high school pastor at our local church, I couldn’t help but think back to my own passage into adulthood.

I graduated in June of 1986, in front of friends and family with my diploma in hand, and a commitment to the people I’d spent nearly a decade with, “to be friends forever”. Within 18 months the friends of my youth became fond memories as the declaration of college majors put us all on divergent, life-altering paths.   Even those friends, who chose similar paths, found themselves with a whole new lifestyle, support structure, and “justifiable” opposition to maintaining the relationships of their youth.

Nearly twenty years later, on June 10, 2007, my heart stopped following its stubborn inclinations as I turned to the Lord in full repentance and faith to not only trust in Him, but to also turn from the godless myths and idols of a corrupt generation.  Family, friends and acquaintances that knew me prior to that day, continue to ask, what happened.  Some have come on the journey with me and some have not.

As well intentioned as we are about maintaining friendships, when we turn from one life to another, we sometimes open the door to relationship causalities.  Unfortunately, our old “friends” may not understand, may not want to be a part of, or don’t feel they have a need to head in the same direction in which we’re headed. Some even claim that they are on the same path, but ultimately end up on a road very different from our own.

The Good News

I remember attending my first reunion after high school.  Everyone eagerly waited to see what this person, or that person looks like now.  What so-and-so was up to. Or, how I could get plugged into so-and-so’s high-level contacts.  Or, maybe just have a night to reminisce about the good old days

Imagine, for a second if you showed up to your high school reunion, or were reacquainted with an old friend, and your news wasn’t about some big firm that you just signed on with, or some high-level contact that would be “a huge benefit” to your friend.

Imagine, that you showed up and proclaimed, that you had figured out how to deal with the whole issue of death!

As I think about past acquaintances or relationships that have been distanced due to the new path that by grace alone, God put me on nearly three years ago, I’m both humbled and thankful for the open doors and the opportunities he has provided to close the gap.  And even though the challenges inherent in living for Christ in a world that has been programmed to “live for themselves” sometimes puts you at odds with formerly close friends and family, we are commanded to obey the Lord’s instruction.

Too often, we choose popularity over obedience.  We do and say things that we feel will make us right in our circle of friends, and not do and say things that will be pleasing to God.

“Why do you call me Lord, Lord and not do what I tell you” Luke 6:46

We can choose to take our blessings, go about our business and answer at the judgment seat of Christ, or we can take every opportunity to represent the truth to former and present acquaintances alike, opening them up to the only thing that could ensure “eternal friendship”.

"But Jesus called them to him and said, “You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great ones exercise authority over them. It shall not be so among you. But whoever would be great among you must be your servant," Matthew 20:25-26

I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.    Ephesians 4:1-3

There are no “ties” in tennis

I’ve been a fan and an avid tennis player for nearly 20 years.  For a significant portion of those two decades I would play not just to win, but to dominate. And while the person on the other side of the net may have had fun, I rarely considered their feelings. My “take no-prisoners you’re here to serve my wishes” mentality was unfortunately encouraged by a worldly attitude that saw my competitive nature as “acceptable”. I’ve always believed that how you approach sports is a good measurement of how you approach life.

This general attitude in my tennis game was ever more present in my relationship with my wife…the girl of my youth who I promised to love, honor and respect till death do we part.  It’s ironic that a game that gave me so much pleasure would ultimately serve to bear witness to the change manifested by the Spirit finally convicting me to treat my wife as who she was…the daughter of the glorious risen king, Jesus Christ!

Where does “Love” come from?

There are many stories surrounding the origins of the use of the word “love” in tennis.  The most notable and widely accepted is the Flemish word for honor, “lof”.  Around the time of the Protestant Reformation, England received a wealth of immigrants from the Low Countries.  At that time tennis was predominantly played for money, if a player scored no points, the phrase “omme lof spleen” would have been applied… he “played for the honor”.

As his beloved children, Christians ought to “play” in such a way that our whole life adorns the teachings of our savior, Jesus Christ.   We are to bring honor and glory to the Son through our walk, “not as unwise men but as wise, making the most of your time, because the days are evil.” Ephesians 4:15-16

Serving to Love him with all our heart, soul, strength and mind

So often in the midst of competition, instead of walking as “children of light” we yield to the world’s definition of good sportsmanship…we blur the lines of what is in and what is out as far as “acceptable” in the heat of battle.  If we are salves of righteousness (Romans 6:19), then our actions should bring glory and honor to God, and not attention to ourselves.  We live by his rules and his Word alone.  “Let us not be conformed to this world, but transformed by the renewal of our mind,” (Romans 12:2).

So the next time, I step out onto the court, regardless of who is on the other side of the net, pray that I always remember who it is I serve and the price that was paid to be a “prisoner of the Lord”. “Whoever thus serves Christ is acceptable to God and approved by men.” Romans 14:18

I stepped on to the court yesterday and unlike so many times before, I had an overwhelming sense of appreciation for the person on the other side.  It became so clear that this was an opportunity to praise God not just for the capacity to perform in corporal bodies, but to have the means and times appropriated for which to enjoy time together.

Throughout the game, I didn’t have to remind myself to take it easy.  Simply put, I enjoyed chasing down the oft sprayed, strayed and out-of-bounds balls. It was humbling knowing that every ball I returned, would be an opportunity for the person on the other side of the net, to improve their own game.

When we were done, I walked over and put my hand on my wife’s shoulder and let her know how well she hit that day.  I don’t believe I’ve ever seen her as encouraged about her game, and her hitting partner as I did yesterday.

There are no ties in the game of tennis; there is always a victor and a loser.  As devout Christians, I can think of no better score then “lof”, one that brings honor to our Father in heaven.

Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God. Ephesians 5:1-2

“For we ourselves were once foolish, disobedient, led astray, slaves to various passions and pleasures, passing our days in malice and envy, hated by others and hating one another. But when the goodness and loving kindness of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of works done by us in righteousness, but according to his own mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewal of the Holy Spirit.” (Titus 3:3-5)

I remember reading Titus 3:3-5 early in my walk as a Christian and thinking how awesome and great is our Lord! As a new Christian, desiring and craving the pure spiritual milk described in 1 Peter 2:2 I had yet to connect the Ecclesiastical definition of “foolish” to the verse in Titus. In the 2+ years since my first pass at Titus, I’ve come to grow up in salvation through the wholly dependence on the Spirit driving an internal desire to be made in the image of our Savior and Lord, Jesus Christ.

Being fully captivated by his grace, and humbled by his outpouring of mercy on my life, paid for and purchased by the blood of his one and only begotten Son, I have been transformed by that grace over these past 2 ½ years in a way that this “chest-pounding” sinner could have never imagined.

My biggest regret, aside from not being in his word enough, occasionally suppressing the Spirit and choosing my own desires, trusting in myself on certain matters and not fully relying and trusting in the plans he has for me, is that I focused way too much time on the sin, and not enough time on the transforming power when we focus on the cross and the righteousness imputed by Christ Jesus.

I look back on the day that I came to the Lord, June 10, 2007 when I repented of my sins, asked for forgiveness for a lifetime of rebellion against the Creator of the heavens and earth, and by faith, through grace alone, put my full trust in him, and I’m in awe of the work he has done to bring glory to the Son.

I only wish, I had started blogging on that day and not nearly three years later.  Why?  Because I feel as if so much has been done to rid me of what my pastor calls, “big jelly doughnuts” those things in our life that we are unwilling to pass up.  I think about the prayers that could have been asked for, the glory that could have been brought to the Son, if I had just started on June 10, 2007.  But I didn’t.  Our sovereign Lord and his providential hand saw it fit to contain my words (at least on a blog) until today. And, while my fleshly desire is to look back, I know in accordance to Luke 9:62, I must put my hand to the plow and follow him by focusing on the gift of service our Lord has laid out for the redeemed.

I’m regrettably sad that the work that has been done, will not be chronicled in the way it would have had I started three years ago, but confident and trusting in the Lord, that he will complete the good work in me (Phil. 1:6), and because of that confidence, I trust that if this is my last blog, or the first of many to come, that the outward expression of my inward reality will continue to mature, and bring glory and honor to the Lord of Lord, and King of Kings, Christ Jesus.

When Paul left Titus in Crete, Titus faced the challenge of looking after men who claimed to be Christians, yet whose primary motives were money, and not seeking the face of God.  I too, have been guilty of putting worldly riches ahead of our treasures in heaven.  I ask that you pray that my heart, while at one time, was foolish, disobedient and led astray, that I am protected from the enslavement of various passions and pleasures, and that my mind and heart be fully focused on the cross, and the doctrine of substitionary atonement, carried out to reveal the indomitable expression of God’s love for his children.

My prayer is that you would not see me through this blog, but that Jesus Christ would be exalted and praised as I share and testify his unending love and amazing grace.